Eight days of ‘clean eating,’ without enough distance between the old and new body, causes anxiety, trepidation, and fear. Without prepared protein, grabbing any and every delectable is likely. A package of Muenster cheese mysteriously ends up in a hand to mouth duel without thought, reason, or consciousness. A declaration and commitment made to unprocessed food just eight days prior leads the cheese back to the kitchen without consumption. Disaster averted, pondering the challenge and bumpy road of this lifestyle change deliberates in my mind.

Wondering why change for the better in exchange for the taste of anything has not been our protocol. Illogically choosing cheese over an improved life, healthier body, or opportunity to become comfortable in my skin baffles us. Prior efforts to deflate the packed-on pounds into submission, release, and permanent removal has been defeated. Weight represents protection, fear, and a lack of self-respect and easing old pain.

To feel comfortable in our skin, experience self-love, respect, and gratitude for our given body, be energized by consumed foods and nurtured by our choices, are reasons to commit to change. During a healing journey, digging and delving deep beneath the surface, we imagine the gratifying result of knowing and feeling happiness, euphoric peace, and self-love. Though foreign presently, change is a clean bite or two away. Numbing feelings, until a bag, box, or bowl empties into our stomachs, is no longer serving nor valuing us, nor establishing successful results.

Feeling emotions is a gift of human nature, self-care, self-love, and self-respect wrapped into one. Pushing emotions away rather than feeling them establishes self-destructive reactions. Acknowledging, embracing, and expressing emotions into existence eases the pain as they dissipate. Numbing them often destructively alters them into anger, depression, and actions in the form of consuming unhealthy foods. Change is a series of small actions repeated over time in exchange possibly for feeling whole, secure, healthy and happy.

This road to recovery is rocky, a path without soft edges or smooth walkways. Paving it as we travel is one of healing, learning, and ultimate, sustainable change. The bumpy avenue levels out, unravels the knots tied long ago, and paves itself as we remove fear, gain clarity, and produce healthy, nutritional habits and results. This walkabout is long and vast, through fog-like, challenging terrain. A smooth road it is not, until the sun shines, the transparency illuminates, and the power embraced to reach any potential exists.