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Imposter

Feeling like a fraud and faking our way through life is normal modus operandi. Much prepares us for life, yet fearlessly facing the unknown, doing something for the first time takes courage and a little, ”Fake it ’til you make it” protocol. Insecurity put on the back burner, forging into unknown territory, and jumping stepping-stone to stepping-stone until functioning with confidence, fortitude, and experience is imperative for transformation, personal growth, and renewal.

On a side note, my seventy-two year-old father-in-law reinvents his career every five years. When asked about his experiences, he notes, “I’ve never taken a job that I knew how to do.” Finding, figuring, and perfecting a new career is similar to any transformation in life. Until arriving comfortably, there is a holding pattern awaiting safe landing into the position. From temporary imposter to confident specialist requires patience, action, and drive for education, experience, and expertise.

Although having posed as a math teacher, entrepreneur, writer, film series host, president of a non-profit organization, and mother, nothing has been more profound than my role as a skinny, kickass, kettle bell-wielding woman. Impersonating skinny, strong, and tough women I first reverted to an overweight, uncomfortable–in–my–skin little girl, fat and afraid to expose herself to the world. Becoming an imposter, you must believe yourself worthy, accept the role wholeheartedly, and act as if you are that individual, faking it until it becomes second nature. Without self-belief, the position is temporary, and expertise unreachable.

Posing as of a thin, badass woman and imitating her actions, I have claimed self-worth to meet the ambition of the person I had not been. Learning her cues, strengthening from boot camp classes, and becoming the woman who respects her body with what she feeds it, I am the thin, confident, worthy woman I impersonated. Becoming that which I desired is a process of fraudulent beginnings. Imitation to start, but a genuine marathon race to the finish line, I medaled in posing, winning the gold for becoming my intended self. When the dots are connected, following a path of those that ventured before, I became my intended, an imposter at first, but genuine victor at the finale.

Published inHealthy Avenue

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